Flying Rats!!!

Canadian geese. They're everywhere, literally. You can look at any sidewalk, playground or parking lot to see the evidence. Not only are they annoying but there have to be some sort of health hazards as well. I find it especially annoying that a pair of them seems to think I need to be awakened at 8:00 every morning.

One day, a few weeks ago, I saw some movement outside my window. On my second-floor balcony a goose was trying to perch on the railing. Apparently this fowl did not realize webbed feet are not particularly well suited for that sort of activity. I pounded on the window with a fist to scare it off.

Some days later I discovered some droppings on my balcony. I do not know what they find interesting there but I find it very irritating. Again last week that lousy bird was on my railing. This time I gave it a blast from a hand-held airhorn, the sort you find people at sports arenas using to deafen the other spectators. It flew off again.

I started looking for more effective deterrents. I heard the suggestion of a bb gun. I like that idea but am concerned about the potential legal fallout. Someone else offered the idea of the paintball gun. I love that idea but decided I don't want to spend that much money on something I will not likely use otherwise. I thought about something on the order of a pepper spray but to be effective I would have to hit it's face and it doesn't seem to be very easy to aim at small targets that move.

I settled on a super-soaker. That is something with a decent range and will not do any harm. I suspect it would be effective for scaring the bird away. They may be waterfowl but that is not something to which they are accustomed.

I believe we need a change in the laws. They are protected because they are migratory birds. I guess someone stopped teaching the geese that they are supposed to travel. They stay here year round. They have no natural enemies and no predators, apart from the occasional Buick.

Eventually, there will have to be a change in policy. As their population continues to grow issues are sure to appear. Every housing devlopement built has to have a lake, retention pond or other water feature that serves to attract these vermin. More people around more geese will bring more conflict. Geese have been known to attack people, usually in the vicinity of their nests. In an apartment complex with children running around that could be a serious problem. Add to that the health hazards of the droppings that they leave everywhere and I expect there will eventually be a call for action.

Besides, with so many people out of work it seems a shame to let all of that free food go right along prospering with impunity, right in front of many people who have nothing to eat...

ME